Hello Ben in Ohio and welcome to Banjo Ben’s Great forum. There’s plenty of good, helpful people here!
I’m in Ohio too (about 35 miles NW of Dayton), where are you?
My son is an engineer and believe it or not, his name is Ben. I know your thinking process very well. Take this lightly but you guys can sure make simple complicated sometimes. I’ve always been a mechanic and a propane technician, so you can imagine the conversations we have.
Anyway, don’t worry about perfect order, whether to fingerpick or flatpick first, or whatever else you think should come first. Simply jump in and enjoy. Always remember, this is for your enjoyment, not a prerequisite to achieving a master’s degree. If you want to flatpick, I would go over the lesson on how to hold the flatpick, This is very important. It doesn’t have to be exactly 100% the way Ben does it, but use it as a guideline to reach your comfort zone. Everyone on this site most likely will hold the pick slightly different than each other including Ben. Ben has lessons in the basic section on both flatpicking and fingerpicking, so pick out something you like and jump in. Whatever you’re doing will help and improve your playing and increase your skill level.
As far as reading music, you won’t see that here or much anywhere else in this type of lessons. Most of us don’t read music and tab is so much easier for anyone to grasp. Not only that, the songs taught are guidelines. Once we learn them, we should be working on changing them up a bit and instilling our own ideas and creating some new licks and such.
I would work on some Carter style songs (Ben has lessons on this too). It’s chords mixed with melody and is great for playing alone and is usually simpler than the all out flatpicking speedy songs.
Most of all, enjoy and have fun. Hope this helps,